Knives Out is the 333rd episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell, Danielle Radford and Lon Harris. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 2019 film Knives Out. It was published on February 18, 2020, to coincide with the film's release of digital/Blu-ray. It is 4 minutes and 20 seconds long. It has been viewed over 1.21 million times.
Watch Honest Trailers - Knives Out on YouTube
"It's more of a 'how done they get away with it', really." ~ Honest Trailers - Knives Out
Script[]
The following trailer is rated S for Spoilers. It's a whodunit, and we're going to tell you who did it, okay? So, one last time: SPOOOOOOIIIILERS.
From the director who ruined your man-childhood (Rian Johnson) comes a film about how, if you act like an entitled dick, women and minorities will take away everything you ever loved. (Kylo Ren smashes a panel) No, not that one. (scene transitions to Marta in front of her newly-inherited mansion) The new one. Aaand mute thread.
Knives Out
Get ready for a brand-new whodunit murder mystery, but since RiJo never met an expectation he couldn't subvert, he'll tell you who done it right off the bat...
Marta Cabrera: (after discovering she gave Harlan the wrong medicine) Oh, my God...
...plus where it got did (Fran opens the door to Harlan's study and freaks out after seeing his corpse), and how it get done (Harlan slices open his own throat, frightening Marta), then slowly reveal who helped done it, who done knew about it, and why it all got getting done in the first place. It's more of a "how done they get away with it", really.
Larry the Cable Guy: Whatever you gotta do, just Git-R-Done.
Meet the Thrombeys, heirs to the world's most sumptuous sweater collection and a mansion that looks like an Applebee's-themed escape room. Their patriarch is Christopher Plummer, the best actor to ever get typecast as the wealthy head of a miserable rich family; when his suicide is ruled a murder, everyone is a suspect, because he spent the night giving his entire family reasons to kill him.
Harlan Thrombey: (to Joni) --this is the last money you [...] will get from me.
Walt Thrombey: Dad, are you firing me?
Benoit Blanc: Harlan was cleanin' house.
Harlan Thrombey: (to Ransom) Not a red dime or word of my work to a single one of them, you included.
I mean, come on, man; don't you know cutting off your relatives is the number-two cause of death in rich people?
[10 Most Common Rich People Deaths
10. Bane
9. Wet Marble
8. Monocle Cut + Hemophilia
7. Tainted Oyster
6. Bohemian Grove Ropes Course Mishap
5. Crushed by Polo Horse
4. Space Tourism Rocket Explosion
3. Fear of Bernie Sanders
2. Cutting Off Relatives
1. Yacht Mutiny]
See? Right behind "yacht mutiny"!
Taking the case is Benoit Blanc, a detective who could really use a fidget spinner (montage of Benoit Blanc fidgeting with various objects), played by an actor who could really use a dialect coach.
Benoit Blanc: Whoa! Okay. We got footprints here...
He's more Southern than a Confederate flag soaked in deep-fried mint juleps...
Benoit Blanc: That-That is hooey.
Ransom Drysdale: Shut up with that Kentucky Fried Foghorn Leghorn drawl!
...but don't underestimate this simple country detective, because he's so good, he... doesn't know who's paying him...
Det. Lt. Elliott: Who hired you?
Benoit Blanc: I do not know.
...doesn't interview key witnesses for days...
Benoit Blanc: (to Great Nana Thrombey) I think you have something you wanna tell me. (leans back) I'm in no rush.
...and lets the main suspect almost die in his care.
Benoit Blanc: (singing while an ambulance approaches) --going left...
Twice. (Ransom attempts to stab Marta, only to discover his knife is a prop) He'll need all the help he can get from Marta Cabrera, a nurse with a rare form of bulimia...
Marta Cabrera: Just the thought of lying... it makes me puke.
...a condition that any good detective could use to crack the case in 30 seconds, but this half-cocked Sherlock can't even smell the lies right in front of him.
Marta Cabrera: You're not much of a detective, are you?
(in a heavy Southern accent) Y'know, I say, for a film called "Knives Out", this, uh, detective here is, uh, about as sharp as a bowlin' ball.
So if you love A-listers, a-holes, and A-gatha Christie, ride along with the silly, fun not-really-a-mystery, where everyone's a red herring and the most famous guy helped do it in the end. Really, the only question you'll have is how one housekeeper kept an entire mansion full of knickknacks, secret passages, and hidden piles of nurse puke clean. (in a snotty teenager voice) "Ugh, yet more plot holes from Ruin Johnson! #RemakeKnivesOut with more puke cleanup scenes!"
Starring: Better Call Drawl (Daniel Craig as Benoit Blanc); If You Need to Spew... Spew Into This. (Ana de Armas as Marta Cabrera); That IS America's A**hole (Chris Evans as Hugh Ransom Drysdale); Gonna Take This House From The Old Frown Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis as Linda Drysdale); Trash Bridges (Don Johnson as Richard Drysdale); Michael Cane (Michael Shannon as Walter "Walt" Thrombey); Inheritary (Toni Collette as Joni Thrombey); 13 Reasons Why You're Out of the Will (Katherine Langford as Megan "Meg" Thrombey); Frank Oz, the Great and Powerful (Frank Oz as Alan Stevens); Get Out! Get Out! (Lakeith Stanfield as Det. Lt. Elliott); Old Deuteronomy (K Callan as Wanetta "Great Nana" Thrombey); and Kevin Spacey (Christopher Plummer as Harlan Thrombey).
The Last P.I.
The honest title for Knives Out was 'The Last P.I.'. Titles designed by Robert Holtby.
If Harlan wanted to kill himself while clearing Marta of any suspicion, why didn't he do it in front of ANYONE ELSE IN A HOUSE FULL OF PEOPLE?!
Viewer's Comments[]
Please sing, "having fun isn't hard when you've got a library card" - Eric Ayala
Trivia[]
Reception[]
Production Credits[]
Voice Narration: Jon Bailey aka Epic Voice Guy
Written by: Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell, Danielle Radford & Lon Harris
Produced by: Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell, & Max Dionne
Edited by: Kevin Williamsen
Post-Production Supervisor: Kevin Williamsen
Production Coordinator: Ryan O'Toole