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Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3: The Black Order is the 237th episode of Fandom Games' comedy series Honest Game Trailers. It was written by Max Song, Andrew Bird, and Spencer Gilbert. It parodies the action role-playing video game Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3: The Black Order. It was published on August 13, 2019. It has been viewed over 200,000 times.

Script Edit

In a world overrun by superhero franchises, a beloved game series returns to give Marvel buffs the double-shot of fanservice they need, and the slack-jawed button-mashing gameplay they deserve.

Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3: The Black Order

Rediscover a series that hasn't seen an entry since the PS2 era, when making a superhero game with light action-RPG elements was considered novel, and marvel at how little they've managed to change since then by focusing on what the fans really want: cameos from characters you like, cameos from obscure characters you can feel cool for knowing about, voice actors that sound 85% like the A-list stars...

Groot: I am Groot.

...and a familiar premise cut almost directly from the ten years of movies you've already watched, all of which tries its absolute best to make up for the fact that you're basically playing Streets of Rage. Look, if the prospect of playing as three distinct Spider-Men doesn't excite you, I'm going to say, "Skip this one."

Fist your way through mobs of mooks in this top-down brawler whose extremely light action-RPG gameplay is less Diablo and more Gauntlet, that will have you furiously combining your special powers into massive explosions of particle effects and numbers in the hopes of whittling down the endless waves of foes so you can move on to the next square-shaped room. And face one of the many game's iconic antagonists in tediously spongy boss fights where they'll eat up your attacks like delicious candy while owning you with lasers, until you break their shields and get three whole seconds to do some actual damage, for a gameplay experience that tests your patience much more than your skills, unless one of your skills is low standards.

Sigh deeply as the difficulty ramps up for no particular reason (deep sigh) and even normal enemies start to soak up damage like the Juggernaut, as you realize that the game only levels up the characters you have active in your team or spend in-game experience boosters to catch your supermen up to the Level 22 street thugs you're fighting, basically forcing you to stick to a handful of characters if you want to make any progress, and also expects you to go replay one-off challenge fights outside of the main story to stay at level parity in a leveling system that feels like it was designed to have microtransactions that got pulled at the last minute. Because it's REALLY hard to imagine that "fun" was the priority here.

Watch your eyes roll into the back of your skull as you confront Marvel Alliance's extremely boring RPG elements, from the sphere grid of tiny marginal upgrades to your stats, to the abilities that all get identical boosts when you level them, and the loot system where, instead of getting new capes or tights or wherever, you pick up random gems that give you an extra 4% endurance. Which is good, because you're going to need all the endurance you can get to see the end of this thing.

So slip into that slimming spandex and get ready to assemble, for a game that boldly ignores the precedent set by the modern era and returns us to a tradition almost as old as video games themselves: mediocre licensed beat 'em ups designed to rip off children.

Starring:

  • Puke Skywalker (Scott Porter as Star-Lord)
  • Trash Panda (Nolan North as Rocket Raccoon)
  • Green John Cena (Brandon Paul Ellis as Drax the Destroyer)
  • Scary Sue (Vanessa Marshall as Gamora)
  • Vin DnDiesel (Adam Harrington as Groot)
  • Right in the Arc Reactor (Eric Loomis as Iron Man)
  • America's Ass (Brian Bloom as Captain America)
  • The Unjolly Green Giant (Fred Tatasciore as Hulk)
  • The Dude (Rick D. Wasserman as Thor)
  • Largely Ignored (Laura Bailey as Black Widow and Bumper Robinson as Falcon)
  • Human Oakleys (Chris Cox as Hawkeye)
  • Anaphylactic Shock (Kari Wahlgren as Wasp)
  • Very Big Cat Man (James Mathis III as Black Panther)
  • Chaos Tiara Magic (Kate Higgins as Scarlet Witch)
  • Super Karen: Talker of the Managers (Erica Lindbeck as Captain Marvel)
  • Stacy Arm Strong (Kathreen Khavari as Ms. Marvel)
  • Captain Canada (Steve Blum as Wolverine)
  • Didn't They Cancel This? (Mary Faber as Crystal)
  • Snakeman (Jason Spisak as Loki)
  • The Inevitable Hulk (Isaac C. Singleton Jr. as Thanos)
  • Cosplay Patreon (Erica Lindbeck as Psylocke)
  • The Beyonce of Weather (Mara Junot as Storm)
  • Marvel's Sonic (Liam O'Brien as Nightcrawler)
  • American Darling Ryan Reynolds (Nolan North as Deadpool)
  • Magnetos, How Do They Work (Tom Kane as Magneto)
  • Leopardon (Yuri Lowenthal as Spider-Man)
  • Spost Malone (Nadji Jeter as Miles Morales)
  • Gwen Stephanie (sic) (Allegra Clark as Spider-Gwen)
  • Leather Daddy Long Legs (Steve Blum as Venom)
  • Murdocks Red Hot (Brian Bloom as Daredevil)
  • Raphael (Kat Cressida as Elektra)
  • Harlem Globe Throttle (James Mathis III as Luke Cage)
  • Kung Pow (Johnny Yong Bosch as Iron Fist)
  • David Copperfield (Liam O'Brien as Doctor Strange)
  • Ashley and the Evil Dead (Kari Wahlgren as Elsa Bloodstone)

...and...

  • Nicholas (sic) Cage (Fred Tatasciore as Ghost Rider) (shows Nicolas Cage as Johnny Blaze transforming into the Ghost Rider).

Disney Ultimate Franchise 3

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The honest title for Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3 was 'Disney Ultimate Franchise 3.'

Now, if you want a real Marvel experience, you have got to play Captain America and the Avengers, because you aren't really a superhero until a man in a speedo (Klaw) throws his big purple fist at you.

Viewer Comments Edit

Say: i am the Naruto running world champion - Joe Hewett

Please say: "FOR THE LAST TIME YOUR PRINCESS IS IN THE OTHER CASTLE!" - Hijiri Byakuren

Please say: "It's time to nep things up!" - Mathew O.

Please say "HEY! Get your leg out of my belly button!" - Julius Quasar

Say "Mozambique Here!" - TheGrindedGamer

Trivia Edit

Reception Edit

Honest Game Trailers - Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3: The Black Order has a 91.0% approval rating from YouTube viewers.

Production Credits Edit

Honest game trailers marvel ultimate alliance 3

Written by Max Song, Andrew Bird, and Spencer Gilbert

Edited by Max Song

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