N64 is the 216th episode of the comedy web series Honest Game Trailers. It was written by Andrew Bird, Max Song, & Spencer Gilbert. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the Nintendo 64 console and the N64 generation of games. It was published on September 4, 2018. N64 was originally published on Smosh Games, but is currently available on Fandom Games. It has been viewed over 900k times.

Watch Honest Game Trailers - N64 on YouTube

"The N64 controller, a device clearly designed by aliens with only the vaguest idea what humans hands look like!" ~ Honest Game Trailers - N64

Script Edit

In an era where almost all video games were about moving from left to right until you're out of continues, get ready for a new generation of gaming. As you leave the beautifully rendered 2D art of the consoles behind and enter a brand new dimension of 3D games -- that all look like a 5-year-old's art project.

Nintendo 64

Discover brand new ways to be terrible at video games as they make the ultimate transition from a thing that anyone can pick up and understand, to an arcane art mostly mastered by 12-year-olds. As the N64 forces your brain to navigate 3D spaces with a digital avatar for the first time, shift the camera not to be constantly behind a wall, and grapple with platforming that suddenly involves depth perception, causing most adults to swear off gaming for like immediately, so they don't get mocked by their own children for sucking ass at Mario. because if you beat your father at Mario Kart, you're the dad now! Listen I don't make the rules!

Once you've wrapped your head around existing in a 3D space, get ready for the Lovecraftian nightmare that is the N64 controller, a device clearly designed by aliens with only the vaguest idea what humans hands look like! As Nintendo ramps up from six buttons and one directional pad, to nine buttons, four of which are also a d-pad, and one slapped on the back, a third prong for the mutated arm that comes out of your chest, and an analogue specifically rigged to destroy your palm when you play that one Mario Party mini-game. In the closest actual video game controllers have come to looking like the ones from ExiztenZ. Say what you will about the 64 controller, but at least you don't have to plug it into your spine!

Experience the dawn of the modern era of Nintendo, as the N64 kicks of a grand tradition that lasts until this day -- of console libraries with a few undeniable first party classics that redefined their genres entirely and pushed their platforms to the absolute limits, rounded out with a third party catalog that's harder to go back to than the week old pizza in the corner of your room. In a console that largely ignored the edgy adult themes that dominated the Playstation, giving you bright vibrant colors - even in the first-person shooters, and more quirky mascot platformers than you can shake a collectible at! And God help you if you wanted to play an RPG. After Paper Mario, the best thing we had is Quest 64, a game so generic, they didn't even name it!

Experience the true power of the Nintendo 64, the four controller ports on the front, and wrap yourself in the nostalgic blanket of split screen multiplayer memories. As the N64 fosters a brand new generation of lasting friendships in college dorms and living rooms across the world, forged in the crucial of Mario Kart, GoldenEye, Smash Bros, and the unspeakable hellmouth that is the Mario Party series. As well as bitter rivalries caused by the long obsolete practice of screen-looking, where letting your eyes stray from the one fourth of your 14 inch TV screen that your characters were on for even a minute was punished with severe censure from your opponents for being cheap and lame! And maybe even earned you a well-deserved kick to the balls! Also, no Oddjob! That s***'s for babies!

So mash those C buttons, slam that vibrating box n the back of your controller, and take a triple jump down memory lane for a legendary console that lives on in the minds of the people that grew up with it, as one of the greatest gaming experiences of all time -- and literally no one else! Coz even if the gameplay is still good, playing them nowadays feels like rubbing your eyes on a cheese grater.

Starring: Bob Hoskins' Jump World (Super Mario 64); Pot Breaking Simulator (The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time); Slappers Only (GoldenEye); Slippy Toads Wild Ride (Star Fox 64); Ape Escape: The Tedium of Collecting All This Stuff (Donkey Kong 64); Pokerazzi (Pokémon Snap); Let Your Brother Smash (Super Smash Bros.); Rainbow Road: The Video Game (F-Zero X); Good Night Moon (The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask); Farmville 1.0 (Harvest Moon 64); Quakerassic Park (Turok: Dinosaur Hunter); and The One With the Musical Number Featuring Animated Sh*t [Literal S@!t Musical Number] (Conker's Bad Fur Day).

Normie-Tendo: 64 Flavors of Platformer

N64 (Honest Game Trailers) Cannot transcribe this video 4-9 screenshot

The honest title for the Nintendo 64 console was 'Normie-Tendo: 64 Flavors of Platformer.'

You know, cartridges may have been behind the times even then, but nothing beats the feel of blowing into one of those suckers and having it magically work!

 Trivia Edit

Reception Edit

Honest Game Trailers - N64 has a 97.5% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Game Fragger called the video "hilarious" and wrote "Like past entries, the latest Honest Trailer isn't afraid to criticize some of the N64's weak points. This includes poking some fun at the console's lackluster collection of third-part games and the odd controller design. That said, the fun video does commend the system for its numerous accomplishments."

In his review of the video, Robert Workman of wrote "The trailer begins by looking at the “simplicity” of 16-bit games (“moving from left and right until you were out of continues,” he notes), and then talks about how the N64 games look like a “five year old’s art project” with their primitive 3D designs. Ouch. We knew the games were old, guys, but come on." He also noted the video "moves on to some nostalgic imagery before talking about the N64 controller, which the narrator insists was designed by aliens that don’t have the faintest idea of what human hands look like."

Production creditsEdit

Honest game trailer n64

Video thumbnail for Honest Game Trailers - N64.

Executive Producers: Matt Raub and Spencer Gilbert

Episode Written by: Andrew Bird, Max Song, & Spencer Gilbert

Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey

External linksEdit

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