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Honest Trailers - Braveheart is the 296th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell, Danielle Radford and Lon Harris. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 1995 epic war film Braveheart. The video is 4 minutes 47 seconds long. It was published on May 21, 2019, to coincide with the 24th anniversary of the film's theatrical release. This video was produced as part of Screen Junkies' Blockbuster Summer season, in which they turned their attention to blockbusters both old and new. The video has been viewed over 1 million times.

Watch Honest Trailers - Braveheart on YouTube

"Journey to medieval Scotland, a place where the men are loud, the women are silent, and everyone's hair is grody." ~ Honest Trailers - Braveheart

Script Edit

Mel lost his wife and got mad [Mad Max]. Then he lost his wife and got lethal [Lethal Weapon]. Now, he'll lose his wife and get brave in,,,

Braveheart

Journey to medieval Scotland, a place where the men are loud, the women are silent and everyone's hair is grody. When their land is taken by history's snootiest conquerors ["Scottish rebels have routed one of my garrisons"], William Wallace will get some payback [Payback (1999)]. But there's no defense against this true Scotsman. He'll yell you into a frenzy. He'll stare you into his bed ["Its just I saw you staring at me, and I didn't know who you were... "Because of the way you're looking at now."] And... He... Will... Rock... You. [clips of Mel Gibson throwing rocks].

Strap in for a tale all about taking back liberty -- that takes every liberty with the true story. Because if it were accurate, there'd be no kilts, bagpipes, or face paint. No wife, princess or plot-centric cuckoldry ["I will bless this marriage by taking the bride into my bed"]. And Wallace's big speech before a battle was actually "Behold I have brought you into a ring, now carol and dance as well as you can." Huh.

But you're not here to learn; you're here for all the hot sweaty action. Whether it's man on man, man on horse, or arrow in butt. Braveheart's got more violence than you can shake a field full of dicks at. [Scottish warriors raise their kilts mockingly before battle, then charge ferociously at their enemies]. Woo! That's what I'm talkin' about!

Do you like torture? You do?! Well thank you for being honest, weirdo! Now strap yourself in because Mel is adding to his bizarrely long resume of pain [clips from torture scenes in Lethal Weapon, Payback, Maverick, and Conspiracy Theory] in an endless torture finale that makes it clear what drew him to the story. ["Rack him."] Ehh, you know what they say. Follow your passion [The Passion of the Christ (2004)]. Eh!? Ehhh!??

So gear up for your dad's 300 that's the kind of Hollywood epic they don't really make anymore. Where the armies are real, the Scotsmen are Australian, and you forgive all of its many flaws because it gets you pumped every single time. [Montage of battle violence. William Wallace: "They'l never take our freedom!"]. Woooo! U-S-A! U-S-A! Uhh... I mean, SCO-OT-LAND! SCO-OT-LAND!

Starring: [Mel Gibson as William Wallace] Kiltmonger; [Patrick McGoohan as King Edward I] King Bad Guy; [Catherine McCormack as Murron] There's Something About Murron; Have Fun Storming the Castle! Prince Adam; [Sophie Marceau as Princess Isabelle] Le Padme; [Brendan Gleeson as Hamish] Tormund Mediumsbane; [Angus Macfaydyen as Robert the Bruce. He widens his eyes, the visuals go psychedelic and dubstep music plays] When The Drugs Hit; [James Cosmo as Campbell] I Used To Be An Adventurer Like You Until I Took An Arrow To The Chest... And an Axe to The Hand... And Another Axe to The Gut; and Game of Thrones? [clips comparing Braveheart and Game of Thrones].
Honest Trailers Braveheart Open Invideo 4-14 screenshot

The honest title for Braveheart was 'White Clansman.' Titles designed by Robert Holtby.

White Clansman

Sure Mel was almost 40 playing a guy in his early 20's, but to be fair, people aged hard back then. I mean look at this guy [James Cosmo as Campbell]. He's 35!

Trivia Edit

Honest Trailers Commentary - Braveheart

Honest Trailers Commentary - Braveheart

Watch the full Honest Trailers Commentary on YouTube

Reception Edit

Honest Trailers - Braveheart has a 97.9% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Geek Tyrant said the Honest Trailer was "pretty hilarious." The site wrote "Yeah, Braveheart is one of my favorite films ever, but that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy laughing at certain aspects of it that are pointed out in this video. As the video points out, you forgive all of the movies flaws because “it gets you pumped every single time."

Production credits Edit

Honest trailer braveheart

Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Braveheart.

Epic Voice Guy: Jon Bailey

Title Design by Robert Holtby

Written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell, Danielle Radford & Lon Harris

Produced by Spencer Gilbert, Dan Murrell, Joe Starr & Max Dionne

Edited by Kevin Williamsen

External links Edit

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