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Cowboy Bebop is the 355th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer GilbertJoe StarrDanielle Radford and Lon Harris. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy, with a special narration by Steve Blum in character as Spike Spiegel for the viewer comments. It parodies the 1997 science fiction anime Cowboy Bebop. It was published on July 21, 2020, as part of Blockbuster Summer, a special run of episodes in which Screen Junkies turned their attention to blockbusters both old and new. It is 6 minutes and 46 seconds long. It has been viewed over 100,000 times.

Script Edit

This summer, we're getting honest about summer blockbusters past and present. This is Honest Trailers: Blockbuster Summer.

In the early 2000's, Adult Swim changed the animation game. But only one classic anime series made fans sit up, rub their eyes, and say, "Aww, I missed Aqua Teen Hunger Force again! Ugh, fine, I'll watch whatever this is." (montage of Spike dodging enemy fire) "Oh, crap... I think I like anime now!"

Cowboy Bebop

Experience a noir-filtered future, where humanity has spread into the Solar System and covered it in, hot, steamy jaaazz (sax solo), where there's so much crime, bounty-hunting is part of the gig economy that attracts only the heaviest chain-smokers. (montage of characters lighting up cigarettes)

Spike: Looks like a plain old moon rock to me, you know?

Girl: (coughs)

Faye: Hey, how much is it worth if we try to sell it?

They're basically Uber drivers with a few more guns. (the Bebop opens fire)

Strap in with the crew of the Bebop, a group of misfits each with their own mysterious and complex backstories that you're not going to get much of.

Faye: I remember everything, really. Everything except my own life.

There's Spike Spiegel, a mean, lean fighting machine (Spike attacks other bounty hunters), who also has a literal mean lean (montage of Spike leaning against walls); Faye Valentine, who's perpetually broke...

Faye: If I get rid of my body, I won't need money.

...perpetually leaving...

Jet: Hey, wait!

Faye: (pointing a gun at Spike and Jet) Stay back! We're leaving!

Jet: Hey, hold on! (Faye takes off)

Faye: I have to go. (Faye leaves and takes off)

...and perpetually wedgied; Ed, a genius hacker who talks like Elmo...

Ed: Edward is Edward. / Ed has never seen this before. / Ed knows where it is! / Today, Ed goes looking for the spoooky, mysterious alien!

Elmo: Elmo is very happy to see you!

...Ein, a super-intelligent Corgi who mostly just acts like a moderately intelligent Corgi; and Jet, that guy your mom dated for a while after the divorce.

Jet: Quit complaining and be thankful there's something to eat. / Then don't come back! There won't be a place for you! / Good riddance!

"You're not my real dad!"

Together, they'll team up to take on the vicious crime boss known as... "Vicious". Occasionally. But mostly, they'll be focused on food...

Ed: Ed is hungry...

Faye: We haven't had anything to eat in two days!

Spike: I haven't eaten bream or halibut in a long while.

Ed: We just came here 'cause there's good food, Faye-Faye! Haha!

Spike: I am starving.

Spike: (swallows his cigarette)

Ed: Seconds!

Jet: That's all there is.

Ed: Aww...

...making a quick Woolong...

Judy: Eight million Woolongs!

Spike: 2.5 million Woolongs.

Jet: 6,300 Woolongs.

Spike: 500,000 Woolongs.

Scientist: 300 Woolongs.

Jet: Only 50 Woolongs...

...or just kind of hanging out. (Ed leans back on Ein, startling him) But no matter the adventure, you can bet that the thing that gets mentioned at the beginning of the episode will be super-important...

Roco Bonnaro: I want to be a tough guy like you, you know? Come on, I can do it.

...and super-depressing.

Roco Bonarro: Master... You see it? I was fluid like water...

Spike: Yeah. Don't try to talk anymore. Hang on! Now, don't die! Don't die!!

Roco Bonarro: (dies)

Wow... That is sad enough to conjure up some introspective sax music. (sax music plays over a battle) Can anyone else hear that, or is that just what my brain sounds like when I watch this show?

So revisit the all-time classic anime that was probably your gateway drug into the hard stuff (Rurouni Kenshin, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Trigun, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Bleach), that clearly, uh... inspired other shows (Firefly) about sci-fi outlaws turned family, in a junk ship with twangy guitar stings, that mixed Asian and Western aesthetics, that was followed by a movie with mixed reviews (Cowboy Bebop: The Movie and Serenity), and while they both might have some all-time great theme songs, only Cowboy's is a literal bop.

Starring: Bed Head Redemption (Steve Blum as Spike Spiegel); Alita: Bounty Angel (Wendee Lee as Faye Valentine); Jet Blue (Beau Billingslea as Jet Black); Ed, Edd, and N.B. (Melissa Fahn as "Radical Edward" Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky IV); Dog the Bounty Hunter (Ein); V With Vendetta (Skip Stellrecht as Vicious); Illegally Blonde (Mary Elizabeth McGlynn as Julia); LADIIIIIES! (air horn noises) (montage of beautiful women); (depressed) Ladies...

Katerina Solensan: Adios. (gets shot up in space)

Bedridden Woman: It's better... if you leave for today.

Alisa: There are other bounty hunts to catch... You don't need this one!

Julia: (to Faye) If you see Spike again... tell him that I'll keep waiting for him.

...Celebrity... Cameos? (montage of characters based on real-world people); Monochrome... (scenes with monochromatic filters); Cowboys... (montage of characters mentioning cowboys); An Actual Cowboy! (Daran Norris as Cowboy Andy); American Health Care...

Doctor: Coming up with 30 million Woolongs for the basic operation, in addition to 54 years of interest payments...

Nurse: 300,280,000 Woolongs.

...Twitter...

"Dr. Londes": --people who believe instantly in dramatic fantasies who can be controlled by tiny dots of light.

...and 2020.

Jet: Nothing good comes from the Earth anymore.

Blade Lounger

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The honest title for Cowboy Bebop was ‘Blade Lounger’. Titles designed by Robert Holtby.

Spike: Oh, great. They're making a live-action adaptation of my life story? Who's stuck with that job? (a Variety article with the title "'Cowboy Bebop': John Cho, Mustafa Shakir Among Four Cast in Netflix Live-Action Series" pops up) Oh. Nice. See you, Space Cowboy. (another Variety article with the title "John Cho Injured on Set of Netflix's 'Cowboy Bebop', Production Halted for 7-9 Months" pops up) Uh... Make that "See you after you recover from knee surgery, Space Cowboy." Huh. Doesn't quite have the same ring to it...

Viewer's Comments Edit

Please say "Whatever happens, happens..." - Your Friendly Neighborhood Neighbor

Say: "Bippity Bop to the beat of Cowboy Bebop's bot". - Allan Ogongo

Spike: ...No idea what that means.

Say "....and you will shed tears of scarlet" - Zedfinite

Spike: Wow. Okay, that's gross.

Trivia Edit

  • This is the first Blockbuster Summer episode based on a TV series.

Reception Edit

Production Credits Edit

Voice Narration: Jon Bailey aka Epic Voice Guy

Written by: Spencer GilbertJoe StarrDanielle Radford & Lon Harris

Produced by: Spencer Gilbert & Joe Starr

Edited by: Kevin Williamsen

Post-Production Supervisor: Emin Bassavand

Supervising Producer: Max Dionne

Associate Producer: Ryan O'Toole

Executive Producer: Roth Cornet

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