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Friends is the 347th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer GilbertJoe Starr, Dan MurrellDanielle Radford and Lon Harris. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the sitcom television series Friends. It was published on May 26, 2020, in anticipation of the upcoming reunion special on HBO Max. It is 10 minutes and 20 seconds long, making it the longest episode of Honest Trailers ever. It has been viewed over 2.3 million times.

Watch Honest Trailers - Friends on YouTube

Script Edit

You watched it for free on TV (after episodes of Mad About You on NBC). Then, you paid to watch the reruns on DVD (The Complete Series). You paid to watch the reruns again on cable (TBS and Nick@Nite). And you paid to watch the reruns again again on Netflix. Now, get ready to pay HBO Max to watch the same reruns again again again (a Hollywood Reporter article with the title "'Friends' Officially Leaving Netflix for WarnerMedia's Streaming Service" pops up), only this time, it comes with an all-new reunion special (a Vanity Fair article with the title "'Friends Reunion Confirmed with a Coordinated Social media Blitz" pops up), again (a Fortune article with the title "'Friends' Reunion: How the TV Show Made Them Stars and Insanely Rich" pops up), that's been indefinitely postponed (a Deadline article with the title "'Friends Reunion Special' Will Not Be Available on HBO Max At Launch Due To COVID-19 Production Shutdown" pops up). Yeah, it hasn't really been our day, or week, or month, or even our year. 

Friends

Welcome to turn-of-the-century New York, where coffee shops are more than just a place to charge your phone, the sweaters are extra-chunky, and the furniture etiquette is just awful. (montage of characters putting their shoes on the couch) GET! YOUR FEET! OFF! THE COUCH!

Monica: No shoes on the furniture!

And meet the friends. There's Joey, an aspiring actor/human garbage disposal...

Joey: Hey, how much'll you give me to eat this whole jar of olives? / Cold cuts, ice cream, limes... / Custard, good. Jam, good. Meat, good.

...Monica, a chef with some seriously undiagnosed OCD...

Monica: You see these little flower blossoms? They should be facing up, not down, because... well, the head of the bed is where the Sun would be. / You want to put the marshmallows in concentric circles. / You don't know the system! There'll be nobody messing with the system!

...her brother Ross, who goes from depressed nerd...

Ross: Hi... / Hi... / Hi... / Someone at work ate my sandwich.

...to manic, unstable buffoon in ten short years...

Ross: Be careful! Very hot plate! Very hot!

Rachel: Ross, you don't even have oven mitts on!

Ross: <wheeze>

...Rachel, a sentient haircut who can only speak in complaints...

Rachel: My life officially sucks. / So, this is Brooklyn.

Joey: He made Rachel cry!

Monica: Rachel always cries!

Rachel: (crying) Oh! That's not true!

...Chandler, an insecure man-child who uses humor to run away from his psychological issues...

Chandler: I have issues with commitment, intimacy... / I make jokes when I'm uncomfortable. / I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!

...and Phoebe. She's a wannabe musician with a mother who committed suicide...

Phoebe: My mom killed herself.

...a father who abandoned her...

Phoebe: My real dad's the one that ran out on us before I was born.

...and a stepfather in prison...

Phoebe: You know how my stepdad's in prison?

...causing her to grow up in the streets...

Phoebe: I was living in a box. / I used to beg for money. / Someday, I'll tell you about the time I stabbed the cop.

...whose estranged identical twin stole her identity to do porn...

Phoebe: (to Ursula) Stop using my name, and shame on you!

...and the dead woman she thought was her mother wasn't actually her mother, and her real mother was alive the whole time.

Phoebe Abbott: I'm your mother.

Phoebe: Huh?

You know what? This is too depressing. Let's just call her the weird one.

Phoebe: (to Joey) The only guy I've ever been crazy about has... gone to Minsk, and I might never-- I may never see him again.

Hahahahahahahahaha... That's our Phoebe...

If you want to know what New York was like in the 90's, read a history book or something? I don't know. But if you want to know what a sitcom set in New York in the 90's was like, Friends is the show for you. Watch these sporadically unemployed twenty-somethings live in multi-million-dollar apartments; and it's a good thing that there's no crime, because these doors will never be locked.

Ross: We have got to start locking that door!

Hahaha! That would be a sensible idea! Watch as they consume some of the finest legally-clearable products of the decade, like Da Ani water, Villa Wafers, Diet Napple, Coron beer, Vinut Vaia, and Sprito, all set against network TV's version of New York's true melting pot, featuring a diverse cast of characters like... Okay, let's see here... Oh! Here we go! Waiter, Receptionist...

Black Receptionist: Sonny will be right with you.

...Clerk...

Black Clerk: How can I help you?

...Coworker You Never See Again, Sassy...

Black Student: I shared my pudding wit' you, man!

Black Man: Mm... Seems like I would've remembered you.

Black Bookkeeper: Mm-hmm...

...and two of Ross's short-term girlfriends. Come on, everybody, at least they tried; let's give them a round of applause for doing the bare minimum! <clap-clap-clap-clap>

Through it all, experience the ups and downs of one of TV's worst love stories: Ross and Rachel, two of the least compatible people in entertainment history. Watch this neurotic intellectual and this spoiled anti-intellectual clash as... <deep inhale> Ross likes Rachel, then Rachel likes Ross. But Ross has a girlfriend, so Ross dumps his girlfriend and dates Rachel. But they immediately break up, then get back together, then go on a break, then break up again, then Rachel decides she likes Ross again, so he dumps another girlfriend. Then they immediately break up, then Rachel wants Ross back, so he says the wrong name at the altar and gets divorced, but now Ross doesn't want to get together. Then they get drunkenly married in Vegas, then divorce. Then Ross gets Rachel pregnant, but they don't get back together, but also, they're jealous of each other, but also, they still decide not to get together. Rachel decides to move to Paris and rejects Ross, but then immediately changes her mind, and they actually do get together just in time for the series finale. (the audience cheers as Ross and Rachel kiss) Oh, what are you people cheering for?! I give this thing ten minutes, tops!

So settle in to binge one of the most iconic sitcoms of all time, featuring all the unforgettable moments you love.

Ross: (to Chandler and Rachel while moving a couch) Pivot!

Ross: "Chanandler Bong".

Phoebe: Regina Phalange.

Joey: Doctor Drake Ramoray.

Ross: WE WERE ON A BREAK!

Just know what you're signing up for, because when you watch this weekly show all at once, you start noticing things, like... how inexplicably horny the characters are...

Rachel: (to Chandler) Stop staring at my breasts.

Phoebe: Nice and tight.

Rachel: (to Joshua) There it is...

Phoebe: (to Rachel) When's the dirty stuff starting?

...how, uh, cold the studio is...

Chandler: Can you see my nipples through this shirt?

...the thin layer of gay panic that covers everything...

Chandler: Let your wrists go. (Joey relaxes his wrists) Not so much.

Joey: Oh.

Chandler: Hey.

Joey: Hey.

Ross: What's my boy doing with the Barbie?

Monica: So how goes the dancing? Gay yet?

Chandler: Oh, I see what you mean; that's quite nice.

(Joey and Chandler nod at each other, then stare in silence)

Joey: More foosball?

Chandler: And beer.

Joey: Yeah.

...and the realization that every character in the show has just one reaction to literally anything that happens. (montage of characters saying "Oh, my God!") Oh, my God, stop it!

Starring:

  • Cougar Town: Origins (Courtney Cox as Monica Geller)
  • Bangs of New York (Jennifer Aniston as Rachel Green)
  • Ross: Dress For Less (David Schwimmer as Ross Geller)
  • Fiona Crapple (Lisa Kudrow as Phoebe Buffay)
  • Matt LeBlank Look on His Face (Matt LeBlanc as Joey Tribbiani)
  • The Bing Bang Theory (Matthew Perry as Chandler Bing)
  • Poultry (a bird and a duck wandering through the apartment)
  • The Janny (Maggie Wheeler as Janice)
  • The One From Screen Junkies (Hal Rudnick from Screen Junkies as an extra)
  • Hooking Up with Relatives (characters talking about dating other characters' family members)
  • Chandler Getting Handsy (Chandler using exaggerated hand gestures when yelling)
  • Could I Be??? (characters using the catchphrase "Could X BE Y?")
  • Bad Dancing (characters dancing awkwardly)
  • Oh Come On! (characters shouting "Oh, come on!")
  • I Know!! (characters saying "I know!")
  • Ugly Naked Guy (the friends observing the antics of the "Ugly Naked Guy" across the street)
  • 90's Stuff (characters referencing trends, movies, and shows from the 90's)
  • How You Doin? (Joey using his catchphrase "How you doin'?")
  • Guest Stars (the audience applauding when a celebrity guest appears)

...and...

  • Twiiiiiins (characters interacting with their doppelgangers)

Dear White People

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The honest title for Friends was 'Dear White People'. Titles designed by Robert Holtby.

So, did Joey star in an early off-Broadway production of Interstellar?

Joey: I'm gonna get on this spaceship... (a ladder lowers in front of him) But when I return... 200 years from now... you'll be long gone. But I won't have aged at all. (ascends with the ladder)

Lauren: So long, Vic!

Viewer's Comments Edit

Say: "Pivot, pivot, pivot!" - like Ross (FRIENDS) - Chariza Ramsey

Please say: "How you doing?" (Friends) - Samuel Pereira

Trivia Edit

  • To make this video, the writers watched 6 episodes of Friends each day for 2 months.
  • After leaving Screen Junkies in April 2020, former writer/editor Dan Murrell returned especially to collaborate on this episode.
  • This is the longest episode of Honest Trailers ever. The previous record holder was Game of Thrones Vol 3 which ran to 10 minutes 7 seconds.

Reception Edit

Production Credits Edit

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Voice Narration: Jon Bailey aka Epic Voice Guy

Written by: Spencer GilbertJoe Starr, Dan MurrellDanielle Radford & Lon Harris

Produced by: Spencer Gilbert & Joe Starr

Edited by: Dan Murrell

Post-Production Supervisor: Emin Bassavand

Supervising Producer: Max Dionne

Associate Producer: Ryan O'Toole

Executive Producer: Roth Cornet

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