Iron Man 3 is the 35th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Ian Weinreich, Dan Murrell, Jason Pickar and Andy Signore. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 2013 Marvel superhero sequel film Iron Man 3. The video was published on September 3, 2013, to coincide with the film's release on home video and Blu-ray. It is 5 minutes and 12 seconds long. It has been viewed over 10 million times.
Watch Honest Trailers - Iron Man 3 on YouTube
"See him like you've never wanted to see him before: insecure, anxious, and paralyzed with fear." ~ Honest Trailers - Iron Man 3
Script[]
When a terrorist mastermind kidnaps the president and brings a country to its knees, there's only one Marvel franchise that Disney can afford to call. (shows a group shot of The Avengers) Pffft, I wish. Actually, just this guy (shows Tony Stark). No, really, just the guy, not even the suit. Tony Stark is Regular Man in...
Iron Man 3
Prepare for an Iron Man movie with hardly any Iron Man in it... and no AC/DC either. Suit up with billionaire Tony Stark as he...doesn't suit up, in a summer blockbuster that, for no reason at all, takes place on Christmas, and see him like you've never wanted to see him before: insecure...
Tony Stark: I'm a piping hot mess.
...anxious...
Tony Stark: Check the hard- check the- is the brain?
...and paralyzed with fear.
Tony Stark: (having a panic attack) Oh God, what am i going to do?!
With Regular Man sidelined by the whispers of children...
Boy (whispering): How did you get out of the worm hole?
...it's up to his latest creation to save the day: Remote Control Man.
Pepper Potts: This is a new level of lame.
You've seen the Iron Man armor hold its own against Thor, the god of thunder. Now, after dozens of upgrades, it... runs out of batteries,
J.A.R.V.I.S.: I need to sleep out, sir
...constantly malfunctions, falls apart (shows the Iron Man suit getting knocked apart by a missile), falls apart again (shows Tony knocking the suit apart), falls apart again (shows the suit getting knocked apart by a truck), falls apart again (shows the suit stumbling over a piece of metal and hitting the ground, coming apart), and takes its sweet time to assemble.
Tony: (is tied to a box spring) That. (he opens his hands and nothing happens) Five, four, three...come on!! Two... (nothing happens) Five, four...
Seriously, The Avengers assemble faster than this.
But Remote Control Man's not alone. Tony spent his downtime building all kinds of robots that break faster than bad cosplay, like Forearms Man (shows a suit with oversized forearms), Choking Hazard Man (shows a suit breaking into smaller pieces while flying), and Crane... Steadying... Juggernaut Man (shows a suit that vaguely resembles Juggernaut). Tony and his crappy suits must pull together to face his greatest foe since alcoholism: The Mandarin.
The Mandarin: You'll never see me coming.
In a timely update of the character, Osama bin Kingsley (Ben Kingsley) plays the brilliant terrorist who manipulates the entire country into doing his bidding.
The Mandarin: My name's Trevor, Trevor Slattery.
Wait, what?
The Mandarin: I'm an actor! The Mandarin, see, it's not real.
No, you can't do that.
The Mandarin (watching soccer): Oooooooleeee, ole ole oleeeeee!
They were doing such a good job, then they turned him into a punchline?! This is Iron Man's arch-f*cking-nemesis! This isn't just ignoring the comics; this is dropping their pants and wiping their butt with 'em! What bad guy did they even replace him with?!
Aldrich Killian: I am The Mandarin! (gets knocked away)
Aw, come on!
Instead, we get Aldrich Killian, an ex-nerd out for revenge after Tony skipped a meeting one time; and his nameless henchmen (Brandt and Savin) with a confusing grab bag of fire powers, like glowing, getting hot, exploding, super strength...?...regrowing limbs? Flame-proof clothes? And shooting fire out of their mouths? They really just made it up as they went along, huh?
Witness the least thought-out sequence of the Iron Man trilogy, as Tony Stark gives his personal address to a terrorist,
Tony: 10880 Malibu Point.
...then goes home and puts on his only unfinished Iron Man suit, lets someone walk through his front door, doesn't see the missile heading for his house until it's on the news, still doesn't activate any kind of home security system or any of the forty other remote-controlled Iron Man suits in his basement, or have J.A.R.V.I.S. call the police, or S.H.I.E.L.D., or an Avenger. So you're telling me Nick Fury shows up for coffee and donuts, but not when Tony Stark might be dead?
So watch as the Iron Man trilogy ends with ten of the franchise's most disappointing minutes, where Killian loses to Gwyneth Paltrow in yoga pants, all the Iron Man suits get blown up for no reason, and Tony has the operation that will make him Regular Man forever...at least until Avengers 2.
Starring: R2DJ (Robert Downey, Jr. as Tony Stark/Iron Man), Gooper Hero (Gwyneth Paltrow as Pepper Potts), Gandhi (Ben Kingsley as Trevor Slattery), Nerdy Memento (Guy Pearce as Aldrich Killian), Murtaugh (Don Cheadle as James Rhodes/Iron Patriot), Vincent Vega (Jon Favreau as Happy Hogan), and The Worst Extra Ever.
Reporter: When is somebody gonna kill this guy? Just sayin'.
And, Not Starring: The Hulk, Thor, Captain America, Nick Fury, Black Widow, Hawkeye, Agent Coulson, Agent Maria Hill, Selvig, or even The Galaga Guy.
Iron Man 3
Tony Stark: So you heard none of it.
Bruce Banner: I'm not that kinda doctor.
Dude, where were you the whole movie?
Viewer's Comments[]
Can you say "I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite store on the Citadel?" - goobienicole
Say "Suck it up, butter cup" - Creature Carl
Say "Bingle bongle dingle dangle, yickedy doo, yickedy da, ping pong, lippy-tappy-to-ta" - beatlechum40
can you say "WHERE'S MY SNACKPACK?" - bazzaman911
Please Say:"At the end of this day, one shall stand, one shall fall!" - Maximillian von Hoven
Trivia[]
- Since this video's publication, Honest Trailers writer Dan Murrell has discussed this video's take on the Mandarin. Dan noted that he didn't actually dislike the way the film handled the Mandarin, but the team included the criticism because they thought it was what the fans were expecting.
- Screen Junkies have produced Honest Trailers for several other films featuring Iron Man, including Iron Man, Iron Man 2, The Avengers, Avengers: Age of Ultron, Captain America: Civil War, Spider-Man: Homecoming and Avengers: Infinity War.
- An Honest Trailer Commentary for this episode was recorded and was available on the Screen Junkies Plus until the website/app was discontinued. Screen Junkies don't currently have any way of releasing the video.
Reception[]
Honest Trailers - Iron Man 3 has an 97.9% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Reviews of this Honest Trailer were mixed, with many media sites disagreeing with some of the Honest Trailer's observations. Collider's agreed that Iron Man 3 has "a number of problems which Honest Trailers latches onto, but sometimes it gets confused by in-movie jokes or makes tired observations that have been picked over by the internet denizens since the film’s May release." Nonetheless, Collider did concede the video was "worth a couple of chuckles, especially for alternate names of Stark’s army of odd-looking suits." Hey U Guys made similar observations, noting that "with every honest trailer, you’ve got to take things in good nature, and of course some of these things are taken out of context in the video below, some are entirely up for debate, whilst others still are valid points." The site went onto note that the appeal of the film's Christmas setting and its take on the Mandarin are definitely "up for debate." Nerd Bastards wrote they agreed with "the little issues" that Screen Junkies pointed out, but still loved the movie overall.
Production credits[]
Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Iron Man 3
Directed by Andy Signore
Executive Producer Mitch Rotter
Series Created by Andy Signore & Brett Weiner
Episode Written by Spencer Gilbert, Ian Weinreich, Dan Murrell, Jason Pickar, and Andy Signore
Edited by Dan Murrell
Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey
External links []
- IRON MAN 3 Gets the Honest Trailer Treatment - Collider article
- Iron Man 3 gets the Honest Trailers Treatment - Hey U Guys article
- Iron Man 3' Gets the Honest Trailers Treatment - Nerd Bastards article
