Jaws is the 156th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Dan Murrell, Joe Starr and Andy Signore. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 1975 American thriller Jaws. It was published on June 28, 2016, to coincide with the theatrical release of the shark-themed movie The Shallows and the Spielberg film The BFG. It is 5 minutes 5 seconds long. It has been viewed over 4.4 million times.
"The best-directed, well-cast, masterfully-scored cheeseball B-movie ever made." ~ Honest Trailers - Jaws
From Steven Spielberg comes the thriller that earned him enough goodwill to make up for a million Crystal Skulls (Indiana Jones: Knowledge is their treasure) - okay one Crystal Skull - and still stands as the best-directed, well cast, masterfully scored cheeseball B-movie ever made:
Experience one of the scariest monster movies of all time - with barely any monster in it, that managed to scare the crap out of you with just two music notes the occasional fin and some barrels, because Speilberg didn't really have a choice (Spielberg: The shark was frustrating. It didn't really work all the time. It didn't work hardly at all). Thank God it didn't work any more or that thing would've made Jaws 1 look like Jaws 4.
People are dying on Amity Island and only one monster is to blame: the town mayor. Watch as this horrible man and his even more horrible blazers do everything they can to keep business going, no matter how many girls, dogs, children, dogs, guys, and other guys keep getting eaten (Mayor: But those beaches will be open for this weekend. Mayor: We need summer dollars.). He is so getting named in the class-action lawsuit after this (Mayor: Tomorrow's the Fourth of July, and we will be open for business).
Out for vengeance is Chief Brody, a cop who wants to keep everyone safe while getting a good buzz going (Montage of Brody drinking alcohol) (Brody:[drunkenly] I didn't do anything, I'm the chief of police). He'll take to the sea with Hooper, the original Instagram hipster (Hooper: Please go to the end of the pulpit. Man: What for? Hooper: I need to have something in the foreground to give it scale), and Quint, a grizzled old fish encyclopedia (Montage of Quint naming various types of fish). Watch as this legendary badass sails out to do two things: kill sharks and sing sea shanties (Quint sings). And he's all out of sea- (Quint sings again). And he's all out of- (Quint sings some more). Qnd he's- (Quint sings). And he's- (more singing). And he's- (still singing). And he's dead.
Return to the movie that invented the summer blockbuster and inspired great claustrophobic horror movies like Alien, but also invented the unnecessary sequel, franchise fatigue and inspired every sci-fi movie that combines sharks with tornadoes (Sharknado) and octopus (Sharktopus) or Tara Reid (Tara Reid uses a handheld circular saw to slice through a flying shark).
So before you see the Spielberg film about a Big Friendly Giant, revisit the film about a big f***ing shark that made everyone scared to go in the water, even though sharks kill fewer people per year than being crushed by a vending machine, that proves you don't need fancy CGI to make a great blockbuster, just one of the best living directors, a perfect cast and one of the most iconic scores of all time... That, err, actually sounds pretty hard. Now I get why they stick with CGI
Starring: SeaQuest (Roy Scheider as Martin Brody); '70's Paul Giamatti (Richard Dreyfuss as Matt Hooper); Captain AAhab (Robert Shaw as Quint); When You Fish Upon a Star (a shooting star appears in the sky); The Universal Studios Tour (Bruce the Shark); This Guy (Chris Anastasio [uncredited] as Out-of-Towner) [Hooper: It's a tiger shark. Out-of-Towner: A whaaaat????]; The Part That Makes You Poop Your Pants (a diver suddenly comes across a corpse in a shipwreck); Legs; More Legs; and Seriously What Is With This Movie And Legs?
You know the book this was based on was set on the Jersey Shore, right? That would have been a very different movie.
(Clips of shenanigans from reality TV show Jersey Shore)
Get 'em shark, get 'em!
- Honest Trailers writer Dan Murrell has a lifelong love of Steven Spielberg movies, especially Jaws.
- Screen Junkies has also made an Honest Trailer for many movies featuring sharks, including Deep Blue Sea, The Meg and Aquaman. See list of Honest Trailers for more.
Honest Trailers - Jaws has a 97.4% approval rating from YouTube viewers. CinemaBlend noted that "this Honest Trailer doesn't hide the fact that they ... think Jaws was impressive." In the same article, CinemaBlend appreciated the Honest Trailer's digs at the characters, and the joke that Jaws is a monster movie with very little monster. Similarly, Slash Film noted that the Honest Trailer was largely positive, writing Screen Junkies has "more praise to give out than they normally do when they decide to skewer movies" but that it still makes some "decent jokes" about the characters. Slate commended Screen Junkies for comparing Jaws to other shark movies, writing that the Honest Trailer succeeds when it "pauses to appreciate what has kept Jaws iconic and unique through decades of lackluster imitations and digital innovations."
Production credits Edit
Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey
Title design by Robert Holtby
Edited by TJ Nordaker & Anthony Falleroni
- ‘Jaws’ Honest Trailer Argues That the Mayor is the Real Monster in Steven Spielberg’s Classic Blockbuster — Watch - IndieWire article
- Watch Jaws Get Ripped Apart In New Honest Trailer - CinemaBlend article
- ‘Jaws’ Honest Trailer: The Best Cheeseball B-Movie Ever Made - Slash Film article
- The Honest Trailer for Jaws Promises the Most Masterful “Cheeseball B-Movie” Ever Made - Slate article