Jurassic Park is the 22nd episode in Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Ian Weinreich, Russell Eida, Jason Mathews, Andy Signore and Dave Child. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 1993 sci-fi adventure film Jurassic Park. The video was published on April 2, 2013, to coincide with the 3D re-release of the film in theaters. It is 3 minutes and 37 seconds long. It has been viewed over 9.4 million times.
"A state-of-the-art theme park that is fully staffed and operational, except for when it rains." ~ Honest Trailers - Jurassic Park
This April, Steven Spielberg invites you to journey back to a time before every movie was needlessly converted to 3D. Jurassic Park, now needlessly converted to 3D.
Revisit the adventure that launched your childhood obsession with dinosaurs, and two really disappointing sequels (The Lost World: Jurassic Park and Jurassic Park III). Re-experience the groundbreaking CGI that still holds up after 20 years, and all of this technology that doesn't (Lex: An interactive CD-ROM!...It's a Unix system.); and re-witness the Goldblum. (shows Jeff Goldblum lying down with his shirt open as sexy music plays)
Enter a theme park full of live dinosaurs made by impossible science, created by John Hammond, a terrible grandfather who will leave his grandkids alone with complete strangers and a T-Rex. When this incredibly dangerous dinosaur park faces inevitable insurance problems, Hammond must finally hire a group of people who actually know something about dinosaurs: Dr. Alan Grant, a brilliant dino bone scientist who loves to traumatize children; Dr. Ellie Sattler, an ancient...plant scientist person; and Dr. Ian Malcolm, who actually knows nothing about dinosaurs.
Together, they will experience a journey through a state-of-the-art theme park that is fully staffed and operational, except for when it rains, stranding them in a deadly zoo that's spared no expense (shows clips of John Hammond saying "spared no expense"), except for tougher fences, more than one security guard, an emergency power supply, sturdier signs, and paying the one disgruntled employee who runs the entire park.
Experience in 3D the unforgettable film that'll constantly remind you of the film that you are currently watching (shows clips of the Jurassic Park logo on park facilities and merchandise), the electrifying excitement of watching a kid in constant peril (Tim Murphy) who cannot die, and the unparalleled visual effects that introduced audiences to the GIF (shows GIF of Dennis Nedry on a computer).
Starring Land Jaws (Tyrannosaurus Rex), Derp Face (Laura Dern as Ellie Sattler), Papa Smurf (Richard Attenborough as John Hammond), Brundlefly (Jeff Goldblum as Ian Malcolm), The Olsen Twins (Velociraptors), Two-Eyed Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson as Ray Arnold), and The Guy from Jurassic Park (Sam Neill as Alan Grant).
Jurassic Park 3D.
(shows a Tyrannosaurus in the Visitor Center) Aw, man, what an awesome shot -- (a banner falls in front of the T-Rex) awww, look at how the banner falls! I gotta watch this movie again.
- Screen Junkies have produced Honest Trailers for many movies in the Jurassic franchise, including The Lost World, Jurassic Park 3, Jurassic World and Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom.
- In addition, there is an episode of Honest Game Trailers that parodies the many Jurassic Park Games that have been released over the years. It features a special guest appearance by Jurassic Park actor Jeff Goldblum!
- This Honest Trailer features the first use of the clip of a dinosaur saying Alan from the film Jurassic Park 3. This went on to become a running joke in Honest Trailers. For more information, see the page about the Alan raptor.
- An Honest Trailer Commentary for this episode was recorded and was available on the Screen Junkies Plus until the website/app was discontinued. Screen Junkies don't currently have any way of releasing the video.
Honest Trailers - Jurassic Park has an 98.7% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Slash Film said despite their appreciation for the 3D conversion of Jurassic Park, it was "hard not to chuckle" at the Honest Trailer. The Mary Sue agreed with the Honest Trailer that Jurassic Park 3D was "unnecessary." However, The Mary Sue wrote that some of the things that Screen Junkies criticized were actually positives, including the out-dated technology. The site wrote, "You have not known joy until you’ve been in a sold-out screening of people laughing at 'It’s an interactive CD-ROM!.'"
Production credits Edit
Directed by Andy Signore
Executive Producer Mitch Rotter
Series Created by Andy Signore & Brett Weiner
Edited by Dan Murrell
Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey
- LOL: Honest Trailer for Jurassic Park 3D - Slash Film article
- The Honest Trailer Folks Are Snarky About Jurassic Park 3D, Diminishing My Anticipation By Exactly Zero Percent [VIDEO] - The Mary Sue article