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Honest Trailer - Logan

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Logan is the 200th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell and Andy Signore. It parodies the 2017 superhero film Logan. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy, and also features actor Ryan Reynolds reprising his role as Deadpool to briefly co-narrate the trailer. It was published on May 23, 2017, to coincide with the film's release on home video and Blu-ray. It is 6 minutes 20 seconds long. It has been viewed over 6.5 million times. This video won Best Collaboration at the 7th Annual Streamys Awards (2017). With an approval rating of 98.9%, it is one of the highest-rated Honest Trailers of all time. Screen Junkies celebrated this video as their 200th Honest Trailer.

Watch Honest Trailers - Logan on YouTube

"Hugh Jackman returns in his ninth go at the character, and the man who took on Sabretooth, Magneto, and Silver Samurai is fighting all-new villains, like... bloody coughing fits, fading eyesight, alcoholism, claw pus, suicidal depression, Mel Gibson facial hair, and the constant urge to nap." ~ Honest Trailers - Logan

Script[]

The following trailer is rated S for Spoilers.

In a cinematic universe known for its huge casts, CGI, and mixed-up timelines, an X-Men movie will rise above its peers, by saying, "F*ck that; we're doing our own thing!"

Logan. Wow, they didn't even put "X-Men" or "Wolverine" in the title. You're getting some big cojones these days, Fox, and I like it!

Enter a sun-blasted dystopia, where the last surviving X-Men have been screwed out of their comic book royalties...

Logan: You gotta be f*cking kidding me.

...and ride along with Wolverine. Once, he was a hero; now, he's one of those Uber drivers you cancel because it looks like he's going to murder you. (shows Logan slicing up a gang member with his claws) Hugh Jackman returns in his ninth go at the character, and the man who took on Sabretooth, Magneto, and Silver Samurai is fighting all-new villains, like... bloody coughing fits (shows Logan coughing loudly), fading eyesight...

Caliban: --you can't read the label on that bottle.

...alcoholism, claw pus, suicidal depression...

Logan: I was thinking of shooting myself with it.

...Mel Gibson facial hair (shows Wolverine's beard compared to Mel Gibson's), and the constant urge to nap. (montage of Logan losing consciousness) And if you think that's depressing, Professor X is even older and sadder than he is.

Xavier: The new Quesalupa from Taco Bell!

I guess it's rated R for... realization that we all... get old and... die. (sadly sings the animated series theme)

Everything will change when Logan meets his clone daughter Laura, a miniature version of Wolverine (shows Laura extending her claws), en español!

Logan: (as Laura yells at him in Spanish) Okay, shut up. Shut up!

Together, Logan and Charles will drive her to the Lost Boys Clubhouse in North Dakota, and... That's it?! Wait, I thought all X-Men movies had to cram in the Phoenix Saga, or time-travel to recast someone! I mean, whose side is Mystique even on in this movie?! They don't even bust through a fence after someone says, "Hold on!"

Logan: Hold on! (drives the limo into a fence, but fails to break through it)

That never happens!

The mutants of the United States have been wiped out by corn, or... something.

Will: --shucking their cloned-up super corn.

Now, thrill as the last remaining Mexican ones are hunted across America, by a man named Donald -- Ahem... -- a cyborg doing his best impression of Val Kilmer in Tombstone.

Pierce: --the Wolverine. / I'm looking for someone who's looking for you.

Doc Holliday (Tombstone): I'm your huckleberry.

Learn about his evil plan from Laura's guardian, a nurse and the best cell phone documentary maker ever.

Gabriela: (over footage of children in cages) They have never seen the sun or the ocean...

There's, like, 50 different shots in this thing. I mean, check out that audio quality! What'd she do, rent a voiceover booth?

Gabriela: They could not be controlled.

Who's even holding the camera?! (shows the person recording getting knocked back by a blast of wind) Man, iMovie must be sick in the future!

So enjoy Hugh Jackman's final performance (?) as Wolverine, that makes the last 17 years of X-Men movies look "meh" by comparison, and even pays off the prophecy from The Wolverine.

Yukio (The Wolverine): I saw you die. You were holding your own heart in your hand. (shows Logan holding Laura's hand as he dies)

(tearing up) See? 'Cause Laura's... holding his hand! And she's his heart... you know? And, uh... Argh! (clears throat) Damn, this movie's hard to make fun of! I gotta call in some help. Let's see here... Michael Bolton? No... Mr. Plinkett... Oh, here we go! (dials)

Deadpool: Mmm, yello?

Heeeeeyy, Deadpool, buddy! It's Honest Trailers!

Deadpool: Who?

Hahahaha! Good one!

Deadpool: No, seriously, who is this? I have you saved as "Fat Betsy, Don't Pick Up". Not sure why I picked up.

So, we're live right now in the middle of our 200th Honest Trailer for Logan, and we were having trouble; was hoping we could call you for something edgy or mean to say? Hmm?

Deadpool: Are you high? I'm not gonna sh*t on Logan; that film is a f*cking masterpiece. If Jackman doesn't get an Oscar nom, I'm setting every VHS copy of Crash on fire.

You're not threatened by another R-rated superhero movie? Full of violence and cursing? Where the hero lives with a senior? Has a kickass girl sidekick? Huh?

Deadpool: Oh, you motherf*ckers! You're not gonna bait me into this; I do the baiting around here, mister. I do not endorse this weak attempt to take down the Jack Man just to goose your views; it's not my fault YouTube keeps unsubscribing people without telling them. But I do endorse James Mangold to make Old Man Deadpool in 2038. (chuckling) Oh, man! How good would that be? Just 90 minutes of Cable and I, changing each other's... space diapers.

That sounds... terrible.

Deadpool: And what would you know, Fat Betsy? This is exactly why I don't take your calls anymore. Good day, sir.

Oh, wait! Please let me be in Deadpool 2--! (dial tone) Aww...

Starring: Logan's Run (Hugh Jackman as Logan/Wolverine); The Nutty Professor (Patrick Stewart as Charles Xavier/Professor X); Snikt Girl (Dafne Keen as Laura/X-23); Young Man Logan (Hugh Jackman as X-24); Steampunk Colonel Sanders (Boyd Holbrook as Donald Pierce); Mex-Men: First Class (the Transigen subjects); and Yelling (montage of characters screaming at the top of their lungs).

The Last of Us

for Logan - The Last of Us. Title design by .

Honest title for Logan - The Last of Us. Title design by Robert Holtby.

Xavier: New mutant, a young one. / They want help.

Logan: There are no new mutants.

Uh, Fox would like a word with you. (a Screen Rant article with the title "New Mutants Reportedly Filming This Summer" pops up)

Trivia[]

  • An Honest Trailer Commentary for this episode was recorded and was available on the Screen Junkies Plus until the website/app was discontinued. Screen Junkies don't currently have any way of releasing the video.

Reception[]

Honest Trailers - Logan has a 98.9% approval rating from YouTube viewers, which is among the top ten highest-rated Honest Trailers of all time. Most media sites reported on Reynold's appearance and commented that the Honest Trailer was not especially harsh. Inverse called Reynold's appearance one of "the most surprising internet cameos of the year" and noted that this Honest Trailer is mostly praise with some nitpicking. MovieWeb also noted that Screen Junkies' take wasn't particularly negative, noting "Screen Junkies was doing a pretty good job poking holes in Logan, but the criticism wasn't as brutal as, say the Honest Trailer for Suicide Squad." ComicBook.com also noted "the honest trailer lacks the same bite others have in the past." Maxim appreciated Reynold's appearance, writing that "we kind of want Ryan Reynolds's Deadpool to invade every Screen Junkies "Honest Trailer" from here on out." Slash Film noted that "the movie was a little more difficult to make fun of because of how great it is, they still have some good jokes, mostly about sad, aging Logan."

Awards[]

Production credits[]

Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Logan

Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Logan

Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey

Title design by Robert Holtby

Series Created by Andy Signore & Brett Weiner

Executive Producer - Andy Signore

Producers - Dan Murrell, Spencer Gilbert, Michael Bolton, Christina Kline

Written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell & Andy Signore

Edited by Kevin Williamsen and TJ Nordaker

External links[]

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