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Moana is the 189th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell and Andy Signore. It parodies the 2016 computer-animated Disney film Moana in the format of a musical episode. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy, and also features parody songs with music by Matt Citron. In keeping with the film, one of the songs is performed in Tokelauan. It was published on March 7, 2017, to coincide with the film's release on home video and Blu-ray. It is 5 minutes 14 seconds long. It has been viewed over 7.8 million times.

Watch Honest Trailers - Moana on YouTube

"Enjoy the highest honor a culture can receive these days: having your traditions commodified by the Disney Corporation." ~ Honest Trailers - Moana

Script[]

Are you ready for a new kind of Disney movie full of strong female characters, no forced romantic subplots, and a celebration of Polynesian culture? Then you'll love Lilo & Stitch.

Maui: Did not see that coming.

Oh, and probably also Moana.

Meet Moana, a strong, determined young woman who won't stop until she gets the job done (Moana: I am Moana. You will board my boat, sail across the sea, and restore the heart of Te Fiti.), who, after ninety minutes of adventure, becomes a strong, determined young woman who won't stop until she gets the job done (Moana: I am Moana. You will board my boat, sail across the sea, and restore the heart of Te Fiti!). She's indestructible, she's fearless, and she's got water powers just as confusing and vague as Elsa's ice magic in Frozen. So, wait, does she even have any water powers at all, or does it only protect whoever has the glowy thing? And if the ocean has her back, why does it keep trying to drown her?

Follow along on Moana's quest to save her homeland by following a super-obvious sign (Maui's fish hook) in a journey that pokes fun at all of Disney's usual tropes (Maui: If you wear a dress and you have an animal sidekick, you're a princess...if you start singing, I'm gonna throw up.) while at the same time being one hundred percent guilty of them, from her cute animal sidekicks (Pua and Heihei) to her grand Mufasa (Tala) to her genie, Maui, an all-powerful, charismatic, brawling, tattooed demigod...so, pretty much The Rock.

Enjoy the highest honor a culture can receive these days: having your traditions commodified by the Disney Corporation; and watch as the Polynesian people, who traveled between islands thousand of miles apart thousands of years ago, are represented by paranoid coconut lovers who would rather starve to death than sail past a three-foot break.

Moana: We were voyagers; we can voyage again! (Tui stares at her incredulously)

Haole for effort, I guess.

So enjoy a film with a soundtrack people can't stop gushing about because the guy from Hamilton (Lin-Manuel Miranda) is involved, and not even the ocean gushes as hard as Hamilton fans, featuring songs like "The They're Really Into Coconuts Song"...

(sung to the tune of "Where You Are")

Tui and Sina: You can't escape;/We're gonna keep you around/And force you to stay exactly where you are./But, hey, we've got coconuts (Hell yes!),/Coconuts, wheeeeee!/We're all obsessed with the coconut; it's so cult-y.

Tui: You'll marry a coconut/When you turn thirteen.

Villagers: We worship that Tom Hanks movie (Cast Away).

Moana: You all are freaks!

..."The Uh-oh, We're Making the Rock Sing Song"...

(sung to the tune of "You're Welcome")

Maui: You can smell what I'm cookin';/I'll save your franchise, make money, no problem!/You all recognize my voice, my bod,/But in one respect, I'm kinda flawed:/I can do anything except sing;/Autotune couldn't get me on track./I'll be president someday; still, I can't sing,/But who else pulls off a fanny pack?

..."The Let It Go-ish Song"...

(sung to the tune of "How Far I'll Go")

Moana: After Frozen did well for Disney, they told me/To sing a clone/of "Let It Go"!/If a song about girls being free makes more money,/Then you should know,/Like Adele Dazeem, it's an off-brand "Let It Go".

...and "The Beautiful Song in a Foreign Language That Could Be Saying Anything Song".

(sung to the tune of "We Know the Way")

Villagers: Haloa, haloa (translation: Yeah, yeah),/E he iailoa na kupu (translation: You don't know the words)/Aua e tolu afe ia tino, e tautala faka tokelau (translation: Because only 3,000 people speak Tokelau)./Haloa, haloa (translation: Yeah, yeah),/E maua e ia na hakumanuianga (translation: This guy (Lin-Manuel Miranda) gets the credit)./Kae he iloa e latou, e hau mai Puerto Rico (translation: Don't they know he's Puerto Rican?).

I hope you like that one, 'cause it turns out it's really friggin' hard to find a Tokelauan translator.

Starring Nemo (Auli'i Cravalho as Moana); Choking the Chicken (Alan Tudyk as Heihei); David Glowie (Jemaine Clement as Tamatoa); Shy Guys (Kakamora); and Wow, Troy Polamalu Really Let Himself Go (Dwayne Johnson as Maui).

Honest Trailers - MoanaOpen Invideo 4-26 screenshot

Honest title for Moana - Pacific Swim. Title design by Robert Holtby.

Pacific Swim

Okay, so wait a second, Rapunzel (Tangled) has demon hair, Elsa has ice powers, and Moana is a waterbender? Are we building up to Disney's Princess Avengers? (squeals)

Trivia[]

Reception[]

Honest Trailers - Moana has a 94.2% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Many media sites praised this Honest Trailer for its music. Geeks of Doom wrote "It’s always great when the gang at Screen Junkies takes on Disney films in their Honest Trailers series. Not only do we get quality comedy, but Weird Al-style parodies of classic Disney songs." CBR.com noted that due to Moana's near-universal criticial approval, Screen Junkies had a difficult task in making this Honest Trailer. They wrote, "they were up for the task, however, finding humor in the movie’s Disney tropes, musical numbers and treatment of Polynesian culture." SlashFilm agreed with the Honest Trailer that the film both pokes fun at Disney tropes, while also adhering to them, and said this "does make it a prime target for some lighthearted jabs by the folks at Honest Trailers." Slate endorsed Screen Junkies' suggestion of an Avengers-style Disney Princess movie, writing it would be "box-office gold."

Production credits[]

Moana

Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Moana

Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey

Title design by Robert Holtby 

Series Created by Andy Signore & Brett Weiner

Executive Producer - Andy Signore

Producers - Dan Murrell, Spencer Gilbert, Michael Bolton, Christina Kline

Written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell & Andy Signore

Edited by Kevin Williamsen and TJ Nordaker  

Music by Matt Citron

Tokelauan Song by:

Gaylon Hindley - Producer

Fredwyn Kisona - Singer

Isitolo Alesana - Singer

Les Atoni - Translator

Martha Samasoni - Translator

External links[]

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