Showgirls is the 232nd episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr and Dan Murrell. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 1995 erotic drama film Showgirls. It was published on February 6, 2018 to coincide with the theatrical release of Fifty Shades Freed. It is 4 minutes 4 seconds long. It has been viewed around 1 million times.
"Do you like sex? Well, not for long." ~ Honest Trailers - Showgirls
Before Fifty Shades of Grey, before easily accessible of internet porn, the sexiest thing you could see on a screen was probably not... (Nomi Mallone: I have a period./James Smith: Huh. See?).
You know it as a cult classic, or just a movie you'd watch on mute as a kid; but in 1995, Showgirls was a biggest deal in Hollywood as the first NC-17 film to get a wide release, penned by the highest-paid screenwriter (Joe Ezterhas), directed by the guy who directed Basic Instincts (Paul Verhoeven), and hated by nearly everyone who was alive at the time (clips of Siskel & Ebert discussing about Showgirls).
Gene Siskel: They don't do anything original screenplay at all. I didn't care for the film.
Roger Ebert: Well, I didn't either.
Nomi Mallone: You don't know sh*t!
You remember Elizabeth Berkley from Saved by the Bell. Now she's grown up and she's bringing the same energy she brought to the caffeine pill episode (Jessie's Song).
(Jessie Spano: I'm so excited!!! I'm so excited!!!).
Watch her act balls to the wall no matter what happening in the scene; whether it's dancing, dancing even harder (Marty Jacobsen: Thrust it! Thrust it!), eating, speaking (Nomi Mallone: F*ck off!/Man: Woah, sorry!), or just anything, really (show clips of Nomi calling for taxi). She'll chew like a rabid dog, then lick it afterwards for good measures (Crowd: Ooh, lick it! Lick it! Lick it!) (shows clip of Nomi licking dancing pole). Woohoo! That cannot be sanitary!
Follow her insane journey from the seedy strip clubs at the bottom (Cheetah's Topless Lounge) to the bizarre volcano acrobat shows at the top (Stardust Casino), with only one person crazy dancing in her way: Cristal Connors. She's the top girl in Vegas, and the only thing she loves more than the spotlight is dog food (Cristal Connors: I used to love Doggy Chow.), and the only thing she loves more than dog food is cocaine (Valet Boy: Here we are.) (clips of Cristal sniffing cocaine) (Cristal Connors: Doing some finest cocaine in the world, darling.) And the only thing she loves more than cocaine is the word "darling" (show clips of Cristal Connors saying "darling"). You're from the Valley, darling; you're not fooling anybody (highlighting "Born" section on Gina Gershon's biodata on Google).
Do you like sex? Well, not for long. Thrill as Showgirls teases you with nudity, then beats you over the head until everyone has the appeal of raw meat in this film that robs bewbs of all their mystery (show clips of Henrietta "Mama" Bazoom opening bra corset, exposing breasts in front of her audience, then flips back to cover it, then repeats), treats sex like a cheap commodity to be brought and sold (Cristal Connors: I'll buy her for you.), and depicts love as something that happens between a man and a particularly aggressive fish (show clips of Zack doing sexual intercourse with Nomi in the pool). Be careful, kids. That's not how the sex works, but it's exactly how you get a yeast infection.
So hike up you G-string, and dance like no one's watching (Nomi Mallone: You can dance!/James Smith: You can't!), because this is either one of the most campy, shallow movies ever made (Al Torres: Must be weird, not having anybody c*m on you.), or it's a brilliant satire on show business that works on levels most people can't even comprehend (Zack Carey: I like a lot different champagnes, but I always stick with champagne.) Naahh.
Starring, Elizabeth Bezerkley (Elizabeth Berkley as Nomi Mallone), VaGina Gershon (Gina Gershon as Cristal Connors), That '90s Haircut (Kyle Maclachlan as Zack Carey), Tragic Mike (Glenn Plummer as James Smith), Joel Schumacher's Gotham (Stardust Casino), The Shape of Water (Nomi Mallone/Zack Carey sexual intercourse in the pool scene), and Being a Lady on the Internet (Tony Moss: Okay, show me your t*ts).
Strip Up 2: The Streets
The only thing funnier than watching Showgirls? Watching it with isolated audio (show clips of Nomi and James dancing and Nomi performing pole dancing with the scene played on the isolated audio).
Crowd: Yeah! Yeah! Woohoo! I love America!
- This video is age-restricted to viewers over the age of 18 which explains its low view count.
- Despite Screen Junkies humorous efforts to censor the film's nudity via pictures of Hal Rudnick's face applied to all nipples, the video was de-monetized by YouTube virtually immediately.
- The writers state they are given more creative freedom for 1 out of every 4 Honest Trailers. They knew this video would not be their highest viewed video ever, because they chose to do it anyway because they had such a strong comedic take on the film.
- Screen Junkies have produced Honest Trailers for another film about strippers, Magic Mike. Screen Junkies have also produced an Honest Trailer for the Paul Verhoeven film Robocop. See list of Honest Trailers for more.
Honest Trailers - Showgirls has a 98.1% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Perez Hilton praised the Honest Trailer for reminding viewers "just how vanilla Fifty Shades really is." Geek Tyrant said "This honest trailer will really explain every reason why this film is trash if you don't already know why." SlashFilm wrote that the Honest Trailer took "some cheap shots at the movie that is so over the top."
Production credits Edit
Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey
Title design by Robert Holtby
Edited by Kevin Williamsen and TJ Nordaker
- The SHOWGIRLS Honest Trailer Is Just A Little Too Real - Geek Tyrant article
- “Showgirls” Finally Gets The Honest Trailer Treatment - TV Overmind article
- ‘Showgirls’ Honest Trailer: That Movie You Used to Watch on Mute as a Kid - SlashFilm article
- Finally! Our Favorite Movie EVER Gets An Honest Trailer! - Perez Hilton article