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Terminator Genisys is the 125th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written Spencer Gilbert, Dan Murrell and Andy Signore. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 2015 sci-fi action sequel film Terminator Genisys. It was published on November 10, 2015 to coincide with the film's release on home video and Blu-ray. It is 4 minutes 37 seconds long. It has been viewed over 4.5 million times.

Watch Honest Trailers - Terminator Genisys on YouTube

"A PG-13 Terminator no one ever wanted or asked for." ~ Honest Trailers - Terminator Genisys

ScriptEdit

The following trailer is rated S for Spoilers, unlike this movie's actual trailer that gave away the only cool part of the entire movie!

After the complete failure of Terminator 3 and the disaster that was Terminator Salvation, you thought the franchise couldn't get any worse. You were wrong. Now, prepare for a sequel so awful, it's not just bad in its own right; it goes back in time to murder the only Terminator films you actually enjoyed:

Terminator: Genisys (pronounced "Ge-NAI-sis"). Th-they mean "Genesis", right? (retypes "Genisys" in the film's title as "Genesis") There we go. That feels better.

In a world where the PG-13 Robocop and Die Hard sequels taught us nothing, comes a PG-13 Terminator no one ever wanted or asked for, with no blood, no butts, no boobs, and almost no original shots or dialogue (shows clips of dialogue from both Terminator Genisys and previous Terminator films).

Prepare for a movie about time-travelling robots that yaps on and on about the convoluted logic of time-travelling robots (Sarah Connor: The 1984 John sent you to, it no longer exists./Guardian: Kyle Reese is remembering his own past, which is our future.) and has the guy with a thick Austrian accent do most of the talking (Guardian: It is merely a matter of tracking all possible futures using an exponential growth and decay algorithm...It is possible if he were exposed to a nexus point in the time flow when you were in a quantum field.), in a plot that will have audiences wondering "What is going on?" and will have the movie's characters wondering "Seriously, what the f*ck is going on?".

No matter where you run, no matter where you hide, you'll never escape from Jai Courtney. The homeless man's Channing Tatum is back, and he's turned Kyle Reese into a blank-faced moron where charisma goes to die. Along for the ride on this lazy "rebooquel" is the fifth and blandest attempt yet at John Connor, J. K. Simmons wasted as a glorified extra, and Daenerys Targaryan as Sarah Connor. C'mon, Khaleesi, you're so much better than this!

Sarah Connor: I think I'm doing just fine.

Prepare for a movie that put more thought into justifying Arnold's saggy old face than it did its own plot (Sarah Connor: The flesh they put on the cyborgs is normal human tissue; it ages.); that literally shoots the heart out of the franchise's best character (T-800), then turns Skynet into an already outdated app --

Eric Thompson: Genisys does everything. My phone will link to my tablet, will link to my computer, will link to my car.

So...like iOS? -- conveniently ignores anything it can't explain; and farts its way to a climax where our heroes must stop a hologram from going through puberty.

Kyle Reese: You're Skynet?

Young Alex: I'm becoming Skynet.

Ughhh.

So do yourself a favor and skip the non-blockbuster non-event of the summer, leaving you with so many plot holes and unanswered questions, we won't even bother to list them here, except for one: how much did they have to pay James Cameron to say this?

James Cameron: I feel like the franchise has been re-invigorated, like this is a renaissance. If you liked the Terminator film, you're gonna love this movie.

This is just so depressing.

Starring Hasta la Vista, Maybe (Arnold Schwarzenegger as Guardian); Mother of Connors (Emilia Clarke as Sarah Connor); Another John's Made of Dust (Jason Clarke as John Connor); LOL Simmons (J. K. Simmons as O'Brien); The Whole Entire Bus Goes Round and Round (shows a school bus flipping through the air); and Stop Trying to Make Jai Courtney Happen; It's Not Gonna Happen (Jai Courtney as Kyle Reese).

Honest Trailers - Terminator GenisysOpen Invideo 3-51 screenshot

Honest title for Terminator Genisys - Terminator: Genishyt. Title design by Robert Holtby.

Terminator Genishyt

So he's sending his dad back in time to have sex with his mom? Why is incest always the go-to plot in time travel movies (shows Lorraine Baines kissing Marty McFly in Back to the Future)?

Viewer's Comments Edit

say: Knock, Knock, Who's There... My BUTT! - Easton Burchard

Say, "Ian McKellen on a trampoline" - Philosophy Tube

say "do the stanky leg do the stanky leg stank stank" - Chrisapossun !

Say: Thunder, Thunder, Thunder, Therndercats HOOOOO!!! - zachary stiles

Please say my username - DeathBySausage

Trivia Edit

  • An Honest Trailer Commentary for this episode was recorded and was available on the Screen Junkies Plus until the website/app was discontinued. Screen Junkies don't currently have any way of releasing the video.

Reception Edit

Honest Trailers - Terminator Genisys has a 96.4% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Many media sites commented on how negative this Honest Trailer was. The Mary Sue said it was "brutal." While Screen Rant noted that while some Honest Trailers "skewer popular movies in a playful, lighthearted manner, this trailer has no such objective; Screen Junkies hold nothing back -- tearing the film apart without mentioning a single redeeming quality." Geeks of Doom wrote that "narrator Jon Bailey doesn’t even try to hide his anger at the final product we got here, mocking everything from the oddly spelled title, to the scene by scene reworkings of the first two films, to the convoluted, never fully explained, borderline ridiculous plot, to the PG-13!" Outer Places claimed that "Terminator: Genisys is an easy target, but go with what works, because it 100% deserves the Honest Trailer treatment."

In contrast, many media sites asserted Screen Junkies' approach was too harsh. Geeks of Doom compared Screen Junkies savage approach with their own feelings about the film, writing "I’m not saying it’s great, but it’s not the worst thing ever." CinemaBlend wrote that the Honest Trailer's knocks against the film's title and advertising campaign were "low-hanging fruit." CinemaBlend also noted that many of them had enjoyed the film. The site ultimately conceded that although the Honest Trailer "does harp on a lot of stuff that is open to interpretation, there are some points that are just too sharp to dismiss" including the wasting of J.K. Simmons and Matt Smith, plus Jai Courtney's performance.

ScreenRant also discussed the importance of the Honest Trailers series to filmmakers, writing:

Filmmakers should look to fan commentary such as these Honest Trailers, because they effectively consolidate many of the gripes that most fans had about the film. In roughly four and a half minutes the trailer offers a list of issues with the film, as well as how to bring it back to its former glory. These potential solutions include: bringing back the R-rating, less convoluted explanations of time travel, and honoring the material which came before it while not entirely relying on it. (Connor Schwerdtfeger, November 10, 2015, ScreenRant)

Production credits Edit

Terminator Genisys

Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Terminator Genisys

Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey

Title design by Robert Holtby

Series Created by Andy Signore & Brett Weiner

Written by Spencer Gilbert, Dan Murrell, and Andy Signore

Edited by Tim Hayes and Dan Murrell

External links Edit

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