Honest Trailers - Venom is the 277th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Dan Murrell, Joe Starr and Lon Harris. It was narrated by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy. It parodies the 2018 superhero movie Venom. The video is 5 minutes 12 seconds long. It was published on New Year's Day 2019, shortly after the release of the film on Blu-ray/home video. It has been viewed over 3.9 million times.
"A gnarly, sick, tight movie you'll love -- as long as you're the kind of person who says "gnarly, sick and tight." ~ Honest Trailers - Venom
From the studio that Marvel lets play with their toys [Sony Pictures], comes the Spider-Man villain everyone wanted to see on screen until... they did [Topher Grace as Eddie Brock from Spider-Man 3: "Hey Parker!" Tom Hardy as Eddie Brock: "Oh my God!"], but this time they can't even afford to put Spider-Man in it.
Get ready for a gnarly, sick, tight movie you'll love -- as long as you're the kind of person who says gnarly, sick and tight. As the genre runs out of Silver Age heroes to adapt and enters the extreme 90s era of leather jackets and attitude. For a film that would have been so much better if it were rated R [Venom bites off a head -- the shot cuts away, obscuring the actual bite]. But it made almost a billion dollars, so ****! What do we know?
Witness Tom Hardy doing just the most with the role of Eddie Brock, as he plays the investigative reporter like a crackhead squirrel. You'll be captivated by his New York (?) accent [Eddie Brock: "I have spent a significant amount of time with one of these creatures up my ass."], his ever-changing man bracelets and so many weird little noises you'll wonder if they've been covering his mouth [Shots of Tom Hardy with a covered face in The Dark Knight Rises, Mad Max: Fury Road and Dunkirk] for a reason [Montage of Tom Hardy making weird noises].
Watch everything change when he's infected by an evil splooge from outer space who goes by Venom: a member of a parasitic race that's gonna conquer Earth, unless humanity can somehow get its hands on a halfway decent sound system [Shots of Venom screaming in response to screeching speaker noises]. Together they'll chomp their way through good and bad guys alike, prompting audiences everywhere to wonder: Does Eddie Brock know what human flesh tastes like? Is he technically a cannibal? When Venom bites off a head his head, does Eddie have to crap out the skull later? Were these all Tom's favorite parts that got cut out? [Article with reports of Tom Hardy saying all his favorite parts of the film were cut out].
Enjoy a film of charm and action, then stop enjoying it while they bore you to death with science talk [Scientist 1: "We're collecting this data as quickly as possible." Scientist 2: "One of the organisms got out of containment."] . Lots and lots of science talk [Montage of science mumbo jumbo: "You discovered a gene therapy that literally doubles the life expectancy of pancreatic cancer." Then why are these hosts showing this hyper-acute infection?" "Subject baseline." "Metabolic abnormalities that are making it hard for your body to maintain homeostasis." "Are you seeing these? He's achieved symbiosis." "Adrenal. Endocrine" "Their protein running diagnostics." "Even fully automated you can't pilot that craft all alone."]
Directing the boredom is the not-so-secretly evil Carlton Drake: a man who wants to destroy humanity in order to save it [Drake: "We brought the planet to the brink of extinction."], a plan shared by this film's villain, Infinity War's, Mission: Impossible Fallout's, and The Predator's and that's just in 2018 [movie posters for: Kingsman: The Secret Service, Fate of the Furious and Watchmen]. Thrill as Drake assumes his final form: Raisin Venom [Riot]. Then try to cheer on the hero as the action concludes with two syrupy blotches wrestling each other like a Winamp visualizer with teeth ["It really whips the llama's ass."].
But Venom's not just an action movie. It's also a love story, as Eddie is torn between his love of Michelle Williams' terrible wig [Anne Weying: "I'm sorry about Venom."] and the special guy inside of him who's ready to make the leap from 'I' to 'we.' [Eddie Brock and Venom: "We are Venom."] And no! It's not weird that I ship Symbrock. The movie made a quarter billion in China and this is how they advertised it [Adorable cartoon-like advertising showing Venom as the perfect boyfriend]. Look, ever since Tumblr changed, this is all I got left. Let me have this one. [Shot of Eddie Brock kissing She-Venom with sexy saxophone music and squishing noises] Ooh! Epic Voicey likey!
So enjoy a comic book film that isn't bogged down by twenty other episodes like the MCU, or the grandiose pretensions of the DC Universe [Cyborg: This is amazing."]. Cuz sometimes it's fun to watch a movie that's just a movie -- even though it did so well Sony will probably use it to kick start an entire cinematic goo-niverse. [shows goos from Ghostbusters II, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II, Terminator 2 an Prometheus] Hard pass, Sony, hard pass. Unless you get Flubber.
Starring: [Tom Hardy as Eddie Brock] Sad Max; [Venom] Inky and the Veins; [Reid Scott as Dan] Dan from Veep AND Dan from Venom; [Michelle Williams as Anne Weying] Man-taster By the Sea; [Riz Ahmed as Carlton Drake] Felon Musk; Everyone Goops; the Rialto Theater; the Rialto Theater; and that's, that's Rialto Theater as well; the Rialto Theatre, again; What theatre's that? Oh, it's the Rialto; and [Woody Harrelson as Cletus Kasady] I'm the Leprechaun.
Close Encounters of the Turd Kind
Venom: Rolling down the street like a turd in the wind.
If you're turds are thin or light enough to roll in the wind, please call your gastroenterologist.
- This Honest Trailer was released while the Screen Junkies team were on end of year vacation. Writer Dan Murrell left for his vacation before the video was finished - the first time he saw the completed Honest Trailer was when it was uploaded to YouTube.
- The Winamp joke was written by Spencer Gilbert. In the commentary, he conceded that most people wouldn't get it, but the people who would get it would love it. The writers call this sort of joke a "One-percenter" because potentially only 1% of people would get it.
- Epic Voice Guy reveals more details about his complicated sexuality in this Honest Trailer. Epic Voice Guy apparently ships the pairing Symbrock (Symbiote/Eddie Brock) even going to far to say, "Epic Voicey Likey!" at the sight of Brock kissing She-Venom. This is not the first time Epic Voice Guy has expressed sexual attraction towards an alien species- he is also sexually attracted to Thanos. It is, however, the first time Epic Voice Guy has expressed attraction to a species so gooey.
- Screen Junkies have also produced Honest Trailers for several other Spider-Man films, including the early-2000s trilogy starring Tobey Maguire, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, The Amazing Spider-Man, The Amazing Spider-Man 2, Spider-Man: Homecoming and the 1970s Japanese Spider-Man TV series.
Honest Trailers - Venom has a 96.5% approval rating from YouTube viewers. Reviews of this Honest Trailer were mostly positive, with many sites highlighting Screen Junkies' comment that Venom should have been rated R, and also for humorously portraying the film as a romance between Eddie Brock and his Symbiote.
Screen Rant said the Honest Trailer was "surprisingly positive." The site wrote that the Honest Trailer's enthusiasm for the Symbrock pairing was "amusing." In the same article, Screen Rant highlighted Screen Junkies' complaints about the lack of an R-rating and the prevalence of science jargon. MovieWeb noted the Honest Trailer "also makes the point that we're running out of big-name Silver Age comic book heroes to adapt. So now, we're moving onto the 90s, which brings with it leather jackets and attitude." In the same article, Movieweb also noted, "this video positions the movie as a love story" and agreed that it should have been rated R. ComicBook.com made similar comments, writing that Screen Junkies "talk about everything you want to hear, from Spider-Man 3 to Symbrock shippers and the fall of Tumblr." The Geekiary called the Honest Trailer "delightful" and particularly praised its mention of the Symbrock pairing, writing, "Screen Junkies’ honest trailer for Venom gives the pairing the fame it deserves."
The Mary Sue wrote "The Honest Trailer for Venom delightfully highlights what’s bad about the movie—a dumb villainous plan, a bad CGI climactic battle—as well as what’s good: Eddie Brock and Venom’s storied love affair." In the same article, the site wrote that the Honest Trailer "zeroes in on what I believe is the precise reason for Venom‘s astonishing box office success," and "in a year where many of us craved some escape from reality, Venom arrived offering just that." In a similar vein, The Playlist suggested the Venom Honest Trailer was a cathartic summary of 2018 in general, writing:
The Honest Trailer for “Venom” can also be seen as a cathartic moment, with one of the most popular, but divisive, films getting the satirical treatment. It’s almost a way of looking at 2018 in our rearview mirrors and saying, “Boy, remember when we were obsessed with ‘Venom?’ It feels like years ago.” (Barfield, C. January 2, 2019, ‘Venom’ Honest Trailer: This Is What Happens When You Let Sony Play With Marvel’s Toys The Playlist)
Production credits Edit
Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey
Title Design: Robert Holtby
Edited by Kevin Williamsen and TJ Nordaker
Assistant Editor: Emin Bassavand
- Venom Honest Trailer: Is Eddie Brock a Cannibal? - Screen Rant article
- Venom Honest Trailer Bites Big Holes Into the Unlikely Blockbuster - MovieWeb article
- 'Venom' Gets An Honest Trailer - ComicBook.com article
- Watch: ‘Venom’ Gets the Honest Trailer Treatment - Screen Realm article
- Are you prepared for the Venom Honest Trailer? - Stack article
- The ‘Venom’ Honest Trailer. - MOE Lane article
- Tom Hardy likened to a “crackhead squirrel” in brutal ‘Venom’ honest trailer - NME article
- ‘Venom’ Honest Trailer: Tom Hardy Stars in A Goopy Movie - SlashFilm article
- Tom Hardy's VENOM Gets Its Very Own Honest Trailer - Geek Tyrant article
- Venom Honest Trailer Relives Eddie Brock's Weirdest Noises - CBR.com article
- Venom’s Honest Trailer Ships Symbrock, Just Like the Rest of Us - The Mary Sue article
- ‘Venom’ Honest Trailer: This Is What Happens When You Let Sony Play With Marvel’s Toys - The Playlist article
- You Need to Watch the “Venom” Honest Trailer for Symbrock Goodness! - The Geekiary article
- Experience the Highs and Lows of Venom in Latest Honest Trailer - Epic Stream article