Honest Trailers Wikia
Honest Trailers Wikia
Honest Trailers Wiki
1,240
pages
in: Honest Trailers, Screen Junkies, Musicals,
and 12 more

Honest Trailer - Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

Sign in to edit

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory is the 184th episode of Screen Junkies comedy series Honest Trailers. It was written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell and Andy Signore. It parodies the 1971 musical fantasy film Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory in the format of a musical episode. In addition to spoken narration by Jon Bailey as Epic Voice Guy, it also features parody songs performed by Michael Bolton. It was published on January 24, 2017, as part of Screen Junkies' annual Fan Appreciation Month. It is 5 minutes 35 seconds long. It has been viewed over 4.3 million times. With an approval rating of 98.9%, it surpassed Frozen to become one of the highest-rated Honest Trailers of all time before being succeeded by Predator a year later.

Watch Honest Trailers - Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory on YouTube

"Watch as he turns a factory tour into a deadly game, where only the generous survive, while the impure are disfigured in accordance with their sins, and a cult of tiny orange monsters dispose of the bodies." ~ Honest Trailers - Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

Script[]

It's Fan Appreciation Month at Screen Junkies, and to reward our awesome fans, we're making the Honest Trailers that you voted for. Here's your second place choice.

From Ro-ahld De-ahl... R-Ro-ald... Dal... From Creepy Dr. Seuss (Roald Dahl), comes a classic blend of fairy tale, horror film, and two ounces of shrooms! (shows Mrs. Teevee eating whipped cream from a mushroom)

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

Experience a movie that's pure children's wish fulfillment, but still wasn't afraid to scar you for life...

Mrs. Teevee: (after seeing an image of chicken getting decapitated during the boat ride) Aah!

...that balanced out its joy and wonder with lessons on how adults were mostly idiots, kids were mostly evil...

Mike: Can't you shut up? I'm busy.

...and even good guys could freak out at any moment in the secret test of your integrity.

Wonka: YOU LOSE! GOOD DAY, SIR!

Candy's good, trust is bad; got it.

Meet Charlie, a sweet boy reduced to poverty because of his con artist grandpa Joe, a swindler who takes money for smokes while the rest of the family eats cabbage water, advocates child abuse...

Grandpa Joe: (to Charlie) What she wants is a good kick in the pants.

...talks Charlie into stealing...

Grandpa Joe: (whispering) Let's take a drink, Charlie. Nobody's watching.

...has two big coke nails (zooms in on Grandpa Joe's overgrown fingernails), and goes from bedridden to dancing as soon as free chocolate comes along.

Grandpa Joe: (dancing and singing) I never dreamed that I would climb over the moon in ecstasy...

We're onto you, Grandpa Joe! We're onto you...

The late Gene Wilder shines as Willy Wonka, the Howard Hughes of diabetes. He isn't just a reclusive nutcase; he's also a master of sarcasm...

Mrs. Gloop: Don't just stand there! Do something!

Wonka: "Help, police, murder."

...crazy eyes, and very likely a serial killer.

Wonka: Two naughty, nasty little children gone. Three good, sweet little children left. (sinister thunderclap)

Watch as he turns a factory tour into a deadly game, where only the generous survive, while the impure are disfigured in accordance with their sins, and a cult of tiny orange monsters dispose of the bodies. Don't believe me? There's no seat on the boat for Augustus Gloop. (shows the boat with all seats taken) Wonka knew what he was doing, man; he knew!

So enjoy a film that will haunt and delight you for a lifetime... unlike the Tim Burton version (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory), which will probably just haunt you. So experience a classic film full of unforgettable music, and to help us remember, here's Michael Bolton. Wait... d-did I read that right?! You mean multi-Grammy Award winner Michael Bolton?!

Michael Bolton: Hello, Epic Voice Guy.

WHOA! What are you doing here?!

Michael Bolton: Uh... you invited me here?

Well, sure, but... we didn't think you'd actually show up!

Michael Bolton: Well, I did. 'Cause I have a new album to promote, and it's called "Songs of Cinema", and whatever you guys did with Deadpool, it worked.

Aw, thank you! Then, let's do this! Featuring... the "Creepy Man" song (to the tune of "The Candy Man")...

Who seems like a nice guy?
Giving treats to you?
Never asks for money, just a creepy hug or two
(The creepy man?)
The creepy man can
'Cause he's got a white van
With even more candy

...the "Dear God, Please Help Us!" song (to the tune of "Oompa Loompa Doompa-Dee-Do")...

Oompa loompa doompadee doo
They are all slaves in need of rescue
Oompa loompa doompadee dees
Their legs are weird
'Cause he broke their knees
Wonka showed up and he fed us some sweets
Then we woke up in this giant factory
We can't talk back without getting a smack
In the first draft we all were black
Don't believe them? Google it

...and the "This Place is a Lawsuit Waiting to Happen" song. (to the tune of "Pure Imagination")

You'll fall in
Burn your skin
In a world
Of safety violations
My factory
Has no health
Regulations
We don't really brew
Candy right
We just toss some shoes into it
Every surface, someone's chewed it
Our chocolate river
Is mixed with
Sewage

(shows Augustus sipping chocolate from the river)

Michael Bolton: Ugh, just... go to "Starring".

Starring: Johnny Depth (Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka); Joe Biden His Time (Jack Albertson as Grandpa Joe); When Senpai Notices U (Peter Ostrum as Charlie Bucket); The Lollipop Guild (Rudy Borgstaller, George Claydon, Malcolm Dixon, Rusty Goffe, Ismed Hassan, Norman McGlen, Angelo Muscat, Pepe Poupee, Marcus Powell, and Albert Wilkinson as the Oompa-Loompas); 90's Alt Rock Band (Julie Dawn Cole as Veruca Salt); What Obesity Used to Look Like (Michael Böllner as Augustus Gloop); and America (Paris Themmen as Mike Teevee).

Saw for Kids

for Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory - Saw for Kids. Title design by .

Honest title for Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory - Saw for Kids. Title design by Robert Holtby.

Wow, thanks for that, Mr. Bolton.

Michael Bolton: No problem... as long as you call me back when you do the fifth Captain Jack Sparrow movie.

Ugh... They're making a fifth one? (shows the logo for Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales)

Michael Bolton: I know, right? I can't wait.

Viewer's Comments[]

"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams". -RhythmicClouds

there's no earthly way of knowing, which direction we are going - fuzzylarge

Say "Daddy! I want an Oompa-Loompa now!" - Abram in Wonderland

Say: The snozzberries taste like snozzberries!" - Paul Nevius

Please say "YOU LOSE! GOOD DAY SIR!!" - blazingsonic

Trivia[]

Reception[]

Honest Trailers - Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory has a 98.9% approval rating from YouTube viewers, one of the highest-rated Honest Trailers of all time. Mashable described the Honest Trailer as "hilariously brutal" and said their highlight was the "This place is a lawsuit waiting to happen" song. The AV Club praised all the songs, writing "Bolton’s the real highlight here." Slate remarked the Honest Trailer humorously characterized the film as "a grim story of murder, slavery, and poor factory hygiene standard." Nerdist noted that the film is already quite sinister, writing "It wasn’t hard to paint Wonka in a sinister light. The film did most of their [Screen Junkies'] work for them." Screen Rant made a similar comment, writing that Willy Wonka has been "long regarded as a movie containing all sorts of weirdly creepy moments, questionable messages and images absolutely not suitable for children, Willy Wonka is probably the perfect subject for a snarky and hilarious Honest Trailers dissection."

In the same article, Screen Rant went on to praise Screen Junkies more generally, writing:

Honest Trailers are great because they say things we've always thought, but in more hilarious ways than we could ever say them. Yes, most of the Willy Wonka jokes are obvious. Yes, the movie feels like it was made for stoners. Yes, Willy Wonka comes across as a sadistic, out-of-control possible serial killer. Yes, the Oompa Loompas are basically slaves and it's very uncomfortable watching them perform their weird moralizing songs at the expense of children who are basically being tortured for character traits that really are their parents' faults. It's all been said before, but never together in one place and so amusingly. (Dan Zinski, January 24, 2017, Screen Rant)

Production credits[]

Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

Video thumbnail for Honest Trailers - Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

Voiceover Narration by Jon Bailey

Title design by Robert Holtby

Series Created by Andy Signore & Brett Weiner

Written by Spencer Gilbert, Joe Starr, Dan Murrell & Andy Signore

Executive Producer - Andy Signore

Producers - Dan Murrell, Spencer Gilbert, Michael Bolton, Christina Kline

Edited by TJ Nordaker & Bruce Guido

LIVE ACTION PORTION[]

Director: Andy Signore

Producer: Warren Tessler

Director of Photography: Basil Mironer

MUSIC[]

Vocals: Michael Bolton

Music Composition & Backing Vocals: Matt Citron

Vocal Production: Greg Chun

Recording Engineer: Jorge Vivo

External links[]

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.